Ada Gray was born at Arlington House to Thornton and Selina Gray around 1855. Selina was the enslaved head housekeeper at Arlington House, and was married to Thornton Gray, a free Black man. Ada was the 5th of their 8 children. Since the status of the mother dictated the child’s status, all of Selina’s eight children were enslaved and owned by Mary Custis Lee, and her husband Robert E. Lee.
While a young girl at Arlington House, Ada worked mainly in the household area like her mother and sisters. Typical tasks for enslaved children could include churning butter, carrying firewood, running errands, and likely other tasks involving unskilled, manual labor. Due to her mother’s role as head housekeeper and maid to Mrs. Lee, the family lived in more substantial quarters than other slaves on the property. Ada and her sisters spent enough time around the Lee family to have gained literacy, and even enjoyed some songs and games with younger Lee family members. Ada would have been about 10 years old at the end of the Civil War in 1865.
Within two years after Lee’s surrender, the Gray family bought land for a small farm in Green Valley along the Four Mile Run1. Ada and her family were able to grow and market their produce in Washington, DC.
When she was older, Ada attended Howard University in 1874, and eventually became a teacher at the Kemper School, a school for colored children, also in the Nauck/Green Valley area from1876 to1882.
She married on October 8, 1890, to Jacob L. Thompson, noted as a Physician. Ada is listed as age 28 on the marriage record for Alexandria (now Arlington) County, though she would have been closer to 35 years of age. Jacob and Ada moved to Kent County, Maryland at some point, and according to the 1900 census, they had 6 children at home, two sons and 4 daughters.
By 1920, Ada was a widow and living back in Arlington County, Virginia, along with 5 of her six adult children. She is listed at her correct age of 62 and was no longer working outside the home, according to the census of that year. She must have been very proud of her children, as they found careers in the US government, the US Postal Service, and the Red Cross.
During her lifetime, Ada, along with her sisters provided crucial details about the Arlington House and its furnishings, and their input proved vital to the authenticity of the Arlington House Restoration Project, but even more significantly, the recollections they shared also helped inform future generations about the lives of enslaved persons in Arlington County.
Ada Gray Thompson died on May 6, 1934, with her cause of death noted as pneumonia and exposure. It is not known whether she still shared her home with her children or grandchildren, but she lived into her late 70s. During her lifetime, Ada accomplished a great deal – on both a personal and societal level, as a notable member of the Alexandria and Arlington African American community.
1. Near present day Shirlington Road and South 25th Street. The footprint of what was likely once the Gray’s drive into their property is still visible on today’s maps.